Its Time To Change - Self Love

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Hello Everybody,
I promised myself that once I started blogging again it wouldn't just revolve around my passion for make up. I want it to be about everything if i want to delve into my personal life I want to be able to click onto my blog and create a new post and just let my fingers type away.

I am 23 years old and since my mid teens say 15/16 I have struggled with my weight. Beauty has no size and nor does confidence but everybody has there image in their head of how they truly want to look.
For me being the size I am ( I have fluctuated between a size 14 & a size 16 since 2014 ) at my biggest i was a size 18, and as I stand at 5'4 I did not feel comfortable and most definitely was not healthy.

Its not great that I suffer from a few mental health issues - Bipolar, Major Depression Disorder and I have severe anxiety problems, my anxiety has got quite bad over the last few months and for me I do feel like losing self love is part of that problem, I don't feel comfortable at social gatherings because I feel like people are judging me etc.

I am all for self love and screaming confidence from the highest point of the highest mountain and I can't wait to feel that way again - I HAVE FELT LIKE THAT ONCE I KNOW I CAN FEEL LIKE THAT AGAIN.

I plan to get back into a fitness routine and not be lazy I work full time but I don't want to have that mindset of ' I have had a long day i CBA to work out ' 30 minutes - 1 hour can be done Stevie!

I also restarted my blog to interact more with people and after a week of having a consistent blog I am already one step closer to feeling brighter and happier. The blogging community really is a breath of fresh air and the support is unreal.

I sit here hoping this post isn't to winey lol, I just wanted to have a bit more of a personal post to share with you all and will continue to document my journey to finding myself again, that doesn't mean being 4 dress sizes smaller will make everything better because it won't I will never body shame myself or body shame a size that is smaller than me or bigger than me. To me its how an individual feels on the inside.

I will have a separate post on how I deal with my mental health. This was just a little hello ( well its a bit of a long one ) and explain where I am right now.

My end goal for 2016 is to feel happier, find some inner confidence and be on the right path. It doesn't happen over night - But taking small steps will get me that bit closer so here goes.

Lots of love to you all

Stevie

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  1. I absolutely love this post!, im aware it may look like im stalking you a little as im commenting on a post back in January but I read your recent posts and thought id start from the beginning because I enjoyed reading them. I can completely relate to this post in every way, I too have anxiety problems and find that its not something many people want to discuss so this post was a breath of fresh air. At the beginning of last year I, like you decided that self image might have something to do with how I felt and the depression I had some how come to be experiencing. Id never felt that way before and I really didnt like it. I decided to download Kayla Itsines Bikini Body guide and hit the gym for 28 minutes 3 times a week. I gained that much courage I signed up for my first half marathon and completed it in October. I have since lost 2 stone and sit here now feeling slightly happier and have more self love than ever before. I can relate to what you said about it not being a need to be skinny, im still a size 8-10 but I feel mentally better than i ever have done. I only signed up to your blog for the beauty hauls and reviews but im so glad I decided to go back to the start. I wish you the best of luck in your journey and wanted you to know that there are other people just like you :)

    Caitlyn | 27 | http://caitlynlandry.blogspot.co.uk/ (Brand new blogger)

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